And that dude was me.
I don’t know that swallow is the right word. But whatever, I had a fricking fly in my ear. Do you hear me? A FLY IN MY EAR!
I was sitting here at the computer last night taking a quick study break and there was this huge fly on the computer monitor. I flicked it away a few times because it was annoying me. Well, I guess that annoyed him because he flew into my ear. I’m not talking about flying and landing on my ear and just crawling in. He freaking flew straight into my ear. FLEW INTO MY EAR!
Now, when it first happened, I actually thought he had flown away, because I was feeling around my earlobe and stuff thinking it landed there and I was going to flick him (I’m not sure why I am assuming it was a boy fly) away again, but he wasn’t there, so I thought he was gone. Over the next 5 minutes I kept hearing an intermittent buzzing sound like he was real close by so I kept swatting the area near my ear to get him away. Then I got up to get a Q-tip (yes brand name, no generic cotton swabs for me) and stuck it in to clean out my ear when… well, I guess what I did was piss the little fetcher off, because he started buzzing like a madfly. Buzz buzz buzz, flapping his little wings trying to annoy me (or escape). I didn’t know what to do; I started freaking out. I started shaking my head violently trying to somehow get him to fly out, but all that was doing was making me dizzy. So I sat down on the bed and called Kate and was trying to decide if I needed to go to the ER or something.
So you know when you get out of the shower or pool and you have a little water in your ear, so you kinda bend your head sideways so the water can drain out. I decided that is what I was going to do next. So I’m bent over, and I’m trying to talk to Kate on the phone, and I’m trying to stay calm, and then I start banging on my freaking head trying to get the little bugger out. I’m pounding on my head, and talking to Kate, and I don’t remember exactly what I told her, but I was telling her something, and I’m banging on my head some more as hard as I physically can, and the bastage falls out, straight down onto the floor. He kinda just walked around on the floor for a minute and I assumed he was going to fly away, but 30 minutes later he was still there walking around, so I trapped him in a jar so he could die. This morning I checked and he was sufficiently dead for me so I decided to talk a picture on my phone, so here is he is…
So I told Kate that finally he came out, and I was really relieved, but then I had the HUGEST KILLER HEADACHE from pounding on my head, which kinda interfered with my studying for the rest of the night.
